Pc Scary Fairy Tales
Has it all gone too far and got out of hand?
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Yes it has! - Now they are targeting 'Fairy Tales' (of Yore)
This is how the story appeared in the Daily Mail on Friday, November 24th 2017 and the only version available is via PressReader so I have reproduced the written word below the facsimile repro.
Smelling salts at the ready! Here’s our (tongue-in-cheek) PC guide to how other classic fairytales need rewriting
Cute or controversial? Clockwise from top left, the Pied Piper, the kiss scene in Sleeping Beauty, Jack and the Beanstalk, and Goldilocks’s three bears
Cinderella
It’s hard to know where to start with this outrageously sexist tale.
First, why is Cinders expected to do the kitchen chores? Were there no men in the house who could be asked to do their share of the domestic work? second, ‘the ugly stepsisters’? No, no. such ‘bodyshaming’ is not acceptable at all.
Children must not be brought up to think it’s ever appropriate to refer adversely to a person’s looks.
Right-thinking parents will be uncomfortable with the casual stereotyping of ‘Prince Charming’, who may in fact simply be an over-privileged 
member of an outdated hierarchical and patriarchal regime.
the prince’s pursuit of Cinders looks dangerously close to stalking – did she ask him to search the kingdom with her lost shoe?
Jack and the Beanstalk
After a risk assessment, it has been decided that Jack will need to wear a hard hat and an EU- standards- compliant harness when he climbs the beanstalk to visit the giant. the beanstalk may also have to be surrounded by scaffolding that meets Royal society for the Prevention of Accidents guidelines, with appropriate health and safety signs.
We do not want the children thinking they can just shin up any old beanstalk without proper regard for their safety, thank you very much.
When the giant booms ‘Fee fi fo fum, I smell the blood of an Englishman’, this may need to be changed to ‘I smell the blood of a UK national’ to reflect the fact that fewer and fewer citizens of modern Britain now identify themselves as English.
Snow White
Let’s face it, the name is a near insuperable problem, given that it discriminates against the BAME community (that’s Black, Asian, Minority Ethnic to you).
Producers will need to show they have given serious consideration to actresses of colour before schools can safely countenance trips to any production of this fairy tale.
Is it sensible to make children fear that apples may be poisoned? Could this not dissuade them from consuming their five a day?
And as for the Queen who gives snow White the apple, she is of course her stepmother, which hardly conveys a positive image of the blended families that are a reality for so many children today.
Finally, we should also beware using the full name ‘snow White and the seven Dwarfs’. this should be changed to something more acceptable such as ‘snow White and the seven People of Alternative stature’.
Robin Hood
While the redistribution of wealth from the rich to the poor is very much to be encouraged, and may even score points for diversity and social inclusion, there are difficulties with this tale.
Does Robin have a licence for his longbow, and has he been on the relevant training course?
Must Maid Marian really swoon at the sight of him, or is this just the sort of ridiculous, regressive male chauvinism we have tried to get away from in recent years?
the teasing of Friar tuck for being overweight is simply fat fascism. Obesity is no laughing matter – just look at the rising incidence of type-2 diabetes – and this sort of thing will only encourage bullying.
schools, however, will find the sheriff of Nottingham a useful teaching aid, since he was undoubtedly a typically rapacious Conservative.
Little Red Riding Hood
Yes, the wolf eats an elderly lady. And yes he tries to eat a little girl, too. But the true message of this uplifting story is surely that we should not be forced into the straitjacket of the gender assigned to us at birth.
When the wolf dresses up in Granny’s nightgown and frilly sleeping cap, he’s not just trying on her clothes, he’s trying a new gender for size.
It’s only a shame the children reading the story never get to find out whether he decided to transition fully or not.
Goldilocks and the Three Bears
There are so many worrying issues here – breaking and entering, trespass, vandalism, theft, and worst of all, overtones of bestiality. It’s amazing this story is allowed in any school library.
And the gender stereotyping is appalling. Why should Daddy Bear get the biggest bed and the biggest chair and the biggest portion? Why should we assume Mummy Bear isn’t the primary earner and perfectly entitled to the bed of her choice?
And why are they ruining Baby Bear’s teeth with all that sugar in his porridge? As for a bed-hopping young girl, what a terrible example to set to a generation of teenagers already beset by sexting and revenge porn.
The Three Little Pigs
Could there be a better example of the selfishness that led to the wicked Conservative government’s housing crisis? Here you have three pigs who could all happily live together in one house, but instead choose to have one each – one straw, one sticks and one brick – thereby depriving two hard-working families of a home.
Humpty Dumpty
Where was the risk assessment? Was there any cognisance of the Working at Height Regulations ( 2005)? Frankly, what was Humpty thinking as he perched on top of that wall?
That said, if only the Tories’ NHS hadn’t been so underfunded and the ambulance service so overstretched, he might just have made it, albeit a bit battered and cracked.
As for references to ‘ all the King’s horses and all the king’s men’, it’s an appallingly outdated and sexist assumption that the monarch would be male. And this at a time when male primogeniture in the royal family has finally been abolished!
Rapunzel
Oh tut-tut. theft, child abduction, kidnap – and trespassing by a prince with a hair fetish.
Pulling roughly on a woman’s locks is no less than sexual violence. And just imagine her terror when he popped in through her window, only to start grooming her with all that talk of the outside world.
And that’s not even considering the health and safety implications. A tower with neither door nor staircase? What if there’s a fire? there’s certainly no evidence of a sprinkler system being installed, or even a fire extinguisher with the appropriate BSI Kitemark.
The Pied Piper
Did the townsfolk of Hamelin have a child safeguarding policy? Even if they were strangers to the Children Act 2004, they should have known that a grown man in a coloured nightshirt should not have been allowed to lead their youngsters off to a mysterious cave. Why didn’t anyone suggest they check the sex Offenders Register?
Aside from the fact that anyone who offers to murder hundreds or rats for money should have set alarm bells ringing at the RSPCA, this story has worrying suggestions of paedophile tendencies that will terrify any children reading it.
Oh, and you should never, ever refer to a differently abled boy as ‘lame’.
I'm not really going to make any further comment about this as much of it speaks for itself. Unfortunately, I do know people who have shifted their mental states to this sort of rubbish since their status has changed but it just goes to show that whatever tenuous link we might once have had and believed we were 'like-minded' friends - it's all changed since they became .... no I'm not going to say it, because if I lump all of the women friends I have into that category then it would be insulting to the two that have remained sane, sensible and who have not lost their common sense attitudes towards life despite having attained the 'status that shall not be mentioned' and whom I still cherish. Oh so sue me ........... !
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